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Post by powerof0ne on Mar 10, 2011 23:50:48 GMT -5
For those of you that have been in a real self defense situation and obviously still alive do you have any advice or words of caution on how to deal with the aftermath?
What I mean by trauma can be psychologically, the surge of adrenaline you have going through you, sick to the stomach feeling, and more.
Speaking for myself, I can sound very cruel when dealing with a jerk or somebody that threatens somebody else. However, in real life or death situations I'm a different person after everything is said and done.
I'm very curious to any of you that know any information on this "subject" because I honestly don't but it's a reality I don't think that is touched upon that often that could benefit others.
I'll put it this way, some people have PTSD and similar issues because of what I'm describing. I don't have PTSD but I still have those "what if" thoughts nagging in the back of my head some times.
Osu!
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Post by smoke on Mar 11, 2011 1:21:29 GMT -5
I try to use verbal Judo if I can.
Though a few times, I can't tell if someone is just heckling me for fun or just to spite me.
Often times, I try to deescalate the situation, I seem like an ass by verbally retaliating too harshly or the person that tries to ignore it and just gets pushed around.
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GJEC
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LOUGHBOROUGH ENSHIN
Posts: 3,218
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Post by GJEC on Mar 11, 2011 1:29:03 GMT -5
I used to get 'the shakes' on the door after things had erupted and been sorted. Trying to stand in my DJ looking cool with twitchy legs was a bit tricky. One of the older doormen noticed and just said, "Walk around and use it up", meaning keep moving to get that adrenaline flushed out. Eventually the shakes disappeared through regular exposure, but if I had a fight today I'm sure they'd be there again. I'd rather get that adrenaline jolt and be explosive than be caught cold though. Better to feel that way afterwards than lose. I didn't feel guilt as I never gave anyone a hard time unless they thoroughly deserved it  Gary |
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Post by smoke on Mar 11, 2011 2:14:08 GMT -5
I'm beating if my adrenaline rush kicks in, it's for a good reason.
I'm just hoping that it isn' wrong!
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Post by medguy on Mar 11, 2011 2:26:25 GMT -5
Also, we don't want Gary to break a hip as he's teachin' the youngun a thing or two!  |
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GJEC
Member
LOUGHBOROUGH ENSHIN
Posts: 3,218
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Post by GJEC on Mar 11, 2011 2:42:50 GMT -5
LOL Always a consideration these days  Gary |
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wullie
Member
I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, there's no way you can prove anything!
Posts: 725
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Post by wullie on Mar 11, 2011 3:48:35 GMT -5
got to love those shakes! means your still alive/concious after the altercation! just like Gary said it's better to 'walk it off' than try and stand there looking cool while shaking like a jelly lol!
i remember the first time i got them as a rookie bouncer 2 days after my 18th birthday, didn't have a clue what was wrong with me and the other 3 bouncers had pulled a disappearing act on me, i thought i was having a stroke! ;D
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Post by senshido on Mar 11, 2011 5:11:44 GMT -5
yep, the adrenalin rush is almost always there, I agree a bit with p01 in that I occasionally think afterwards, I should maybe have done this or that a different way,
I dont lose my rag often, but when I do its a bit of a red mist moment
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Post by walshy on Mar 11, 2011 7:26:56 GMT -5
RE the shakes, i had that as a lad after some of the few scraps i got into at school. Weirdly i just used to get it in my left leg, it used to shake like mad. Luckily i've never had a fight as an adult so don't know if it would still happen!
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Post by alan on Mar 11, 2011 8:18:46 GMT -5
no matter how deserved, i have always felt "guilty" afterwards. i also have worried about possible repercussions in the future after getting the better of the "wrong" people.
this doesn`t go away with me, you just learn to deal with it over time.
the worst i had was at a nightclub with a friend (tom who came to oban) about 25 years ago, somebody headbutted tom so i knocked him clean out with a punch, now he had about a dozen friends with him.."travellers" needless to say i ended up unconscious behind the bar...the bouncers did a runner!
when i got myself together i found tom in a similar state, with only one or two of the others still there, matey i had knocked out suddenly came round and started threatening everybody still there, he made a bee line for me screaming, you were the one that hit me........so i bashed him again and he went clean out again, the others backed off, so we left..me with one eye completely closed!
now, why i tell this story is: a week later matey got badly hospitalised by somebody with a knife and he hadn`t seen the attacker but they thought it was me!
through a "third part" i got "interviewed" and they accepted it wasn`t me.....this was the second most scared i have ever been because until the "acceptance" of innocence i was up for a "visit"
this could have happened anytime 24/7 with ANY sort of weapons and amount of people!....so, guilt and apprehension are my after thoughts.
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Post by knuckleheader on Mar 12, 2011 19:48:48 GMT -5
I was seriously injured years ago from a fight with a bouncer. He came looking for me, cause I berated his manly ness upon leaving the bar. Anyway, it was a serious head injury. For months after, I was easy to anger and somewhat out of control with reckless behavior.
Just glad to have survived and calmed down. I had quit drinking, resumed drinking. Been alcohol and drug free for a long time.
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wullie
Member
I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, there's no way you can prove anything!
Posts: 725
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Post by wullie on Mar 13, 2011 4:08:10 GMT -5
I was seriously injured years ago from a fight with a bouncer. He came looking for me, cause I berated his manly ness upon leaving the bar. Anyway, it was a serious head injury. For months after, I was easy to anger and somewhat out of control with reckless behavior. Just glad to have survived and calmed down. I had quit drinking, resumed drinking. Been alcohol and drug free for a long time. Glad your here Knuckleheader! I never understood why some bouncers take things personally, to me it was just a job, people could call me whatever and rant as much as they wanted, I would just laugh it off, if your going to take it personal why do it? Would never hit anyone unless they directly attacked me. |
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Post by noahh on Mar 15, 2011 5:59:26 GMT -5
Through sheer luck in my adult life I have avoided non dojo fighting, beyond a few instances of restraint on others.
Regrets comes with most altercations for me verbal or physical. Sometimes I can sure it up with righteous indignation. But too often I am able to trace back to a point in the escalation where I made a choice. Where some part of me said "F*#% it, if he wants a fight I'll give him one." It doesn't need to have turned physical for me to have the regret.
I think it's a good thing that second guessing, it hasn't stopped me being an argumentative bastard but it has toned me down a little over the years.
PO1, I think the best thing you can do is talk it out with a confidant. Preferably one who enjoys spousal privilege and can't ever testify against you. Not being sarcastic in this instance. I have walked through the odd conversation and realised that in a court situation admitting the course of the conversation could have laid the blame squarely in my lap.
Osu!
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Post by powerof0ne on Mar 16, 2011 12:55:32 GMT -5
Some of my own personal experience with this is stuff I did in the military. I even still relive my infamous parachute accident from time to time and realize how damn lucky I am to still be here and able to still walk. Other parts are incidences I had when I wasn't that wise (who says I am now) that involved guns coming into the mix. However in all of this I can say that through all of this it was in self defense.
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