Post by MMX on Mar 26, 2013 12:38:06 GMT -5
I am not a fan of Crossfit methods myself so I may be biased a bit.
Read this and then tell me if you know about Strength and Conditioning if their methods are really worth it..
chroniclesofstrength.com/1/post/2013/03/the-truth-about-crossfit.html?awt_l=P3Sb6&awt_m=3df5s4ndSImcqdT
I’ll start with the confession that I have, for quite some time, and against overwhelming demand, avoided even the briefest mention of Crossfit on my site.
Two reasons:
It should be noted that the number of fitness professionals who are capable of anything that is properly describable as rational thought is always greatly overestimated. This is to say that the precise number of those in the field who are on the level, intellectually, of, say, a farm raised turkey—(the only animal dumb enough to stare up into the rain and drown itself)—is always put far too low. The same could be said of college professors if it were not so gracious.
To this end, if I were to allot even 1/8 of 1% of the time needed to refute these morons, it would still demand more hours than a day allows.
Secondarily, and surely a hypothesis soon to be tested, is that I fear any criticism of Crossfit will lift the flood gates and encourage a deluge of simpletons to pour in from the backwoods with the heroic notion to defend something that is frankly, indefensible.
These imbeciles tend to make a great mess of things, and I take great effort to keep a safe distance between them and myself at all times.
But, alas, an article* regarding Crossfit has been recently pushed with great force, and so the collective IQ of the human race has been struck down once again—bringing us to a quarterly low of 17.
This article demands nothing less than my full refutation, and no matter how vain my efforts may ultimately be, I—for reasons hardly explainable—believe I’m morally obligated to set myself to this lamentable task. It’s that bad.
*I call it an article because it’s categorized as such on the website, but it is more than an article. The 700 and some odd words when separated out are by themselves fairly harmless. It is only when they are arranged in such a specific and delicate manner—that is, an arrangement made possible only by a legitimate nincompoop—that they then take on a dark and demonic power, like when the straw of a broom is mixed with the lash of a black cats eye. The final effect of this sorcery is the stark reduction of the reader’s intelligence; perhaps a permanent one, too. There are many writings like this. But this is the winning sample.
The article, I should mention, is written by some fellow named Joshua Bunch and is called It’s Crossfit and It’s Going to Hurt. You may read it HERE.
[EDITORS NOTE: Mr. Bunch, the author, Joshua the Dopey, and The Cretin may all be used interchangeably henceforth.]
No man, I dare say, can ever enter into that article and come out the other end in a bettered condition, mentally, physically, or otherwise. Yet I can’t help but to find its general air somewhat charming. It’s stenched in stupidity—no doubt—but still, once I started I could not leave it alone until it was read three times through, each time to the very finish!
With each pass I was hooked more deeply by its incoherent, but nevertheless enthused ramblings, and slowly found myself feeling sentimental about it—to a minor degree.
Mr. Bunch’s baby is incurably deformed—botched to the farthest extent of the word—but still, it is his darling, and we ought not so hastily toss it off a cliff. We have a duty to first inspect it, to cast a closer eye onto its hideous face, to see what there is to be learned when we study stupidity in its most natural environment, one so rich and conducive for the life and prosperity of the thing itself—the internet. Then we may kill the darling, blast it straight to hell.
Now it is quite important that you enter into Mr. Bunch’s article with properly set expectations.
First, do not imagine in there you will find any ingenuity or imagination. All of Dopey’s fragile defenses have been raised at one time or another by other imbeciles.
*Amazingly, Joshua makes no attempt to shield himself with Crossfit’s most strained defense mechanism—to call itself a sport and to duck behind the cover that that brings. Even more astonishingly, he brings with him to battle no tested weaponry at all! For example, he makes no mention of good coaches vs. bad coaches in the world of Crossfit. This is a common maneuver to avoid crossfire, and a sometimes powerful neutralizer, but he doesn’t even think to bring it up. He has effectively managed to leave his entire suit of armor at home and venture into the trenches clad only in socks and underpants. This is a commendable merit.
Second, do not think you’ll find in there anything describable as lucid thought, logic, or sense. But this is not a markdown—not in the slightest, not at all—no, in fact, this is The Cretin’s highest selling point entirely—this is precisely what makes his work so humongously endearing (!)—precisely what captivates the mind against all of its working rationality, shackles it until one has read it to the finish many times, and leaves it in a prayerful state for more!
I’m sure many of you, by now, have been harassed by this bunkum ten times over. If for the off chance you have not, I’ll attempt to paraphrase the author’s thesis in short: Crossfit is bound to hurt you (injure you). And this is OK because it will make you look good.
To begin, the author trots out the claim that training resembles a coin:
“Training is like a coin. One side is result; one is risk. You can’t have one without the other.”
If we are to follow the trail of this mishandled analogy, we are to reach the conclusion that each time we train we are at a 50% risk for injury—as this is the generally accepted theory of coin toss probability, is it not? That each time you toss a coin you are evenly likely to land hands as you are tails? If this theory holds, then something here looks wrong…
Undeniably, there is inherent risk with training, as there is with all other things. But unless you are setting someone to the business of what this author calls Crossfit—which is to say setting someone to the business of puerile nonsense—then that risk should be on par with what is assumed from walking the dog, flying in an airplane, riding in an elevator.
This author…
…Let me diverge to talk on Mr. Bunch’s writing style, as it’s strangely distinctive and worth a passing mention. It’s similar to the common style of today—the kind of where one tries very hard to write well, but ultimately does not succeed. Most idiots can write this style. But Mr. Bunch’s, I believe, is truly inimitable. Not even the lowermost idiot could write. To reiterate: Not even Greg Glassman himself could write it. Joshua is less talented as a writer, I’m afraid, than he is even as a coach—that is, his abilities with words are on par with what one might reasonably expect out of an unwashed baboon. But this wrongs the baboon and I shouldn’t have said it.
One example, to scratch the itch, then I pass on.
“When you start CrossFit you will be overwhelmed by a sense of accomplishment. It hangs in the air like the smell of a pretty girl's hair. You'll feel like the mayor running for office in Pleasantville - kissing babies, shaking hands, making friends”.
The first rule, when handling similes, is to set them up so that they are contextually appropriate. For this, he cares nothing. The second rule is then to make them not suck. Appears to be above that as well.
This fellow is not a coach, but an entertainer. He is to the fitness industry what Kevin Trudeau is to weight loss, a court jester, nothing more.
To further drive my point:
“To this day, after six years of constantly CrossFitting, I still get butterflies every time I workout. I don’t get them from imminent bliss - I get them from inevitable pain. Pain I choose to endure, risk I choose to take for the tremendous reward to follow. Rewards that look like chiseled abs and massive shoulders on the outside. “
Statements like these may suck in the mentally botched, but mean nothing to folks who’ve been to school. The intelligent person understands that aesthetics are not a faultless reflection of good health. The intelligent person understands that eye-catching aesthetics—what this fellow likens to “chiseled abs and massive shoulders on the outside”—are quite obtainable without “inevitable pain”.
Now as much fun as we’re having, do you think would be unfair for me to continue this diatribe solely against The Cretin? As dull as he may be, he is but one very stupid person in an organization full of very stupid people. He is admittedly a small mark lower than most, perhaps, but still he is a common constituent.
Crossfit: Fitness Delirium Tremens?
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Crossfit—created in 2000 by Greg Glassman—has quickly become something of a public nuisance.
There have been a number of cases marking Greg as more of a comedian than a coach, so I can only imagine that this whole Crossfit thing started out as a joke. But the danger with venturing satire, you see, is that Greg fell into a trap shared by many humorists: people took him seriously. So, before long, Crossfit, flourishing lushly in the fields of folly, began to attract—in the thousands—the less civilized.
Today romantic fools hurl themselves through a series of daily systemic thrashings, all the while wrenching elbows and crunching spines with slapdash technique and a less than choice selection of exercises. This is not to say that all of the ingredients are wrong, but rather, it’s the general recipes themselves--the mixings, the orderings, and the serving sizes that appear incorrect.
I love heavy deadlifts. But not “for time”. I love Olympic lifting. But not “for time”. To rep these out “for time” limits the major functions of these movements (to increase limit strength and raw power) and promotes a minor function traditionally unrelated to both the deadlift and Olympic lifting; this is to say a metabolic endeavor, which is better served by, well, just about anything else, really.
The most basic and appropriate function of exercise, if I recall from last month’s issue, should be to condition someone for something other than exercise. Whether that something is a sport or not is of small significance. Exercise is, and should remain, a means to an end, but Crossfit has forgotten this detail. This is a dangerous enterprise.
Turn exercise into a competitive sport and you’ve plowed fertile grounds for grievous bodily harm. Quality is swapped for quantity, things get sloppy, people get hurt.
Mr. Bunch offers his concerned response to this in closing:
“Haters try to destroy CrossFit's reputation by telling stories of people getting injured because they pushed too hard in a WOD or local competition. Let them tell those stories. If there ever was a sales pitch for CrossFit, that's it. Any exercise program that can motivate people to work that hard - to give their all - is exceptional and worth defending. “
His article is at last complete, a minimum of twenty sentences written, and not a single one of them of any value! What brilliancy! This is an effect no one man could ever achieve unintentionally. No, this is a concentrated effort. This is by design.
While he may be done, I am not.
Intense exercise is best served in small to moderate doses, which is to say, just enough to get the job done and not an smidgeon more. Crossfit has overlooked this detail as well.
I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again, even at the risk of coming off as overly repetitious: a workout should contain no unnecessary exercises and a training program no unnecessary workouts. Crossfit pays no attention to this.
Their defense to this is to say the Crossfit athlete is both strong and lean. Well, sure, some of them are. But levels of strength and leanness are not perfect indicators of health or function. I’m strong and lean. But I don’t dare say this is what makes me healthy. To understand this is to know what it means to say there are differences between fitness and health, performance and wellness.
Furthermore,let's not forget that exercise should promote beautiful movement, and serve to correct dysfunction, never exaggerate it. This too, is a detail that has tiptoed past the sights of Crossfit.
Their defense here is to jump into the ambiguous term of scalability. But this argument is both infantile and irrelevant. Scalable does not mean progressive. Scalable does not mean appropriate.
Is There a Solution?
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So now, we must ask ourselves, is this conundrum solvable? If so, what are the possible solutions? Perhaps we can talk to coaches like Mr. Bunch? Ask them to change their ways*? Educate them?
*I’ve found it’s mostly best to avoid talking sense to the people, as they confuse logic for a headache. It seems that, in all respects, they are to various degrees deathly allergic to intellectual discussion; any engagement of their prefrontal cortex results in an immediate, and profound series of adverse bodily reactions—a violent temper tantrum—a jarring of the head, a balling of the fists, a stomping of the feet. If, however, your intention is to reprimand them, then it is best to squirt them gently on the nose with a water mister.
Some propose radical remedies, going so far as to say Crossfit should be banned. But I don’t think that. Quite the opposite, really, as I’m a large proponent of individual liberty. And with freedom comes every man’s right to be jackass.
Besides, Crossfit has proven to serve a hidden, but valuable purpose—one that up until now has been carried out only by public zoos. That is, it keeps all of idiots in one place and it keeps them entertained. Shut down the Crossfit boxes and where will they all go? Congress?
But here I contradict myself, and am now obligated to recant my previous thesis and submit the following: Crossfit is not a public nuisance; it is a wholly just and efficient public service. As it is nature’s way for the unintelligent to congregate, commingle, and beget their own kind; any attempt to interfere with this is a dangerous mistake.
And so, if Crossfit provides a location for the containment of the mostly brainless (it does), then membership should not be prohibited, but subsidized. I can think of no better use of the taxpayer’s money. I offer to write the petition myself, and to provide fine cigars to all who will sign it.
- Pat Flynn
PS – There is a chance I could be wrong on all of this, you know. It has happened to me before, once, when some fellow graciously pointed out that I “missed the point”. When I asked him what the point was, he himself could not accurately describe it, least not in plain English. When I asked him if he could point it out to me on the page, he could not, but reassured me it’s right there, said you can’t miss it, sticks out like yellow thong in math class. Apparently, my eyes glided over it, but my brain did not pick it up. Apparently. When I asked him if he could please direct me to a higher authority on the matter, someone who might have caught this elusive, indefinable, indescribable communication, and preferably someone who might be able to capture this abstraction and turn it into something inviting, definable, understandable, he, of course, could not, and called me a Jackass. Nonetheless, he remains undeniably correct. I missed the point, whatever it was. And to this day, I still have not found it.
I Hate Crossfit -- By Jim Ferris
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**The following is a guest post by Jim Ferris, strength coach, and presenter at Strength Fest 2013
My name is Jim Ferris and I Hate CrossFit. I am sure that statement has already has you taking sides of love or hate. I am completely fine with that. I am not trying to win any friendships or make enemies. I am simply writing my opinion on a topic. Over the last few months the topic of CrossFit has been brought to my attention by clients, friends, and people asking me what i simply think. Instead of having little chats with people i decided i would just go public with my opinion and let my voice be heard.
I flat out hate CrossFit. SImple as that! So what. I have friends that do CrossFit. Guess what. I also hate cheap domestic beer and country music and i have friends that like all of those too. I am fine with that. Just writing what i feel kids. Yes you crossfitters will defend your “BOX” and say you do it the right way. You will say that you spend so much time on technique and that you care about safety, etc. I have heard it all. Keep drinking that Kool Aid kids. I have my reasons for how i feel.
For those knowing nothing about me here is a little bio. For 12 years i have been in this field. I have seen the good, bad, and ugly in a variety of ways. I have worked with collegiate teams, S & C coach for the Philadelphia 76ers, trained athletes of all ages, ranges, and abilities. I also have several everyday fitness clients that like to get after it as well. My philosophy of training is to prevent injury, enhance performance, and educate as much as i can. I believe in science, i believe in application of theories and practice, i believe in doing things the right way. I have a few certifications from CSCS, NASM, FMS, TPI. I also have a 4 year college degree in Exercise Science. The letters after my name do not define me. My GYM Ferris brand is a training philosophy using the knowledge i have gained from all of those certifications, internships, workshops, books, and discussions amongst my peers over the years. Nothing is really set in stone with me. I am constantly thinking, rethinking, and tweaking how i go about my ways. I am not a CSCS guy, or a NASM guy. I am my own brand. I disagree, agree, debate with my peers and its always done with RESPECT. I believe its how you get better as a coach. At least it works for me that way
CrossFit serves a small percentage of the fitness community. There are 3 types of crossfitters from what i can see. The cream of the crop that shine in this so called sport have a decent athletic base, high level of pain threshold and simply do not get injured or can train thru pain. Those that fail at CrossFit are those of the unfit community and have low levels of pain threshold. There is that middle group of on the fence athletes who will either get better or get hurt. If you can survive the early stages of CrossFit you should see some fitness changes. Your body is adapting to a new form of exercise so it is very simple to get better. If you never tried yoga before I am sure you would be much better after a few months. Make sense???
So what bothers me so much about CrossFit? Why do i hate it? I am simply going to list briefly four reasons why i am not a fan of this so called sport.
Reason #1 - CrossFit Certification
I hear so many stories about people that do crossFit for 3-6 months it seems and they are really good at it ( whatever that means ). Then all of a sudden they are certified!!! One weekend - no prerequisites needed, and a 50 question test will get you teaching by monday morning. If this certification was on top of having a degree, and some other certifications i would not be so against it. You are simply being certified in someone’s theory. MEMORIZING how to train is not UNDERSTANDING how to train. These weekend warrior certifications are just pieces of paper from my view. There needs to be more to make it relevant.
PS - I do know some CrossFit coaches who have other certifications and degrees which i do have respect for. It is not all hate kids. I am really against the commercialized system it has created.
Reason #2 - Exercise Selection
Olympic Lifts - Power/Explosive exercises
Complex Full Body Exercise. It is all about technique
Power = Strength x Speed
Exercises - Cleans, Power Cleans, Jerks, Snatches
These exercises are not meant for endurance, fatigue, rep outs, or timed events. No debate here. Simple science.
Olympic Lifts require tons of joint ROM and practice. It is a high level exercise skill. It is a Point A to Point B as fast and efficient as possible exercise. The weight is technically weightless when done correctly. If you find yourself muscling up a olympic lift you are not doing a olympic lift correctly. Efficient form in low doses is the only way these exercises should be performed. This is a major issue with me and CrossFit philosophy. You can be a great technique coach BUT when you go into the timing of reps with olympic lifts i simply cant take you seriously on exercise. There is nothing every day life about endurance olympic lifting. Every time i bring this topic of discussion up with crossfitters they have either agreed with me or just gone silent.
Reason #3 - Fitness
CrossFit has taken exercise and turned it into a competitive sport claiming to have the fittest people on the planet. What is fitness? Is it as many reps as possible? Is it a timed event? Surviving a WOD without ripping your shoulders out of socket? Exercise is designed to make you better in everyday movement, your sport, and your life. It should not send you to your knees and crumble you 3-4x a week with AMRAP drills. I do understand people love a good killing to end their workouts. I do it within reason. If my clients, and more importantly my athletes cannot go and perform their sport after our training session i believe i have failed them as a coach. Training with weights while the body is breaking down can cause several issues from muscles, joints, tendons, ligaments, and nervous system.
The Central Nervous System (CNS) plays a massive role in determining how high you can jump. Too much volume of high intensity jumps and heavy weight training causes the CNS to fatigue. When this happens you won't be able to train as hard, run as fast, or most importantly jump as high. Facts are facts but keep doing pogo Box Jumps because you need to get those reps in fast.
PS - I had a physical last month and my heart rate was 54 beats per minute. Blood pressure 120 over 85. Does that put me into the category of fit?
Reason #4 - Injuries - breakingmuscle.com/crossfit/it-s-crossfit-and-it-s-going-hurt
Read the article above. A CrossFit Coach claims exercise is like a coin flip. I kid you not!!!! “One side is result; one is risk. You can’t have one without the other.”
Injury can happen to anyone at anytime even with a great program and a great coach. I have had a athlete tweak a back or shoulder a few times over my 12 years but nothing to put them out of commission. How can you go into a training session with a 50/50 chance of repping out a record or popping your achilles pumping out max box jumps??? Injury can happen anytime, anyplace BUT when your program is preparing you for injury possibility do you not see something wrong with that??? I understand this is one man’s thought and not the majority BUT it scares me that CrossFit allows guys like this to open a box and train people. It is total absolute garbage.
The bottom line is CrossFit has a lack of Quality Coaches, Quality Exercises and Quality Programming. Here is a program i saw posted over the weekend. Explain to me the point of this please.
run 400meters
300 box jumps
run 400meters
300 kb swings
run 400meters
300 goblet squats
run 400meters
I know there are quality coaches and I am sure there are some good workouts floating around out there. Remember i am more against the system of CrossFit, i am not against any individual or box (besides the guy who wrote that story above). Do i want CrossFit to fail? No. I want it to get better because they have the attention of many athletes and fitness enthusiasts. I want CrossFit to improve across the board. Proper education, Proper Exercises Selection and Proper Programming. It is the same for me and my business. I want to give my clients the best, nothing less. I take a ton of pride in my field and i only want to see good for all. CrossFit has zero effect on my business. I simply want to see quality products from every fitness trainer, coach and gym on the planet. Can my mind be changed on CrossFit?? Sure. Fix all the above and i will without a doubt be open to it.
What Do You Think?
Read this and then tell me if you know about Strength and Conditioning if their methods are really worth it..
chroniclesofstrength.com/1/post/2013/03/the-truth-about-crossfit.html?awt_l=P3Sb6&awt_m=3df5s4ndSImcqdT
I’ll start with the confession that I have, for quite some time, and against overwhelming demand, avoided even the briefest mention of Crossfit on my site.
Two reasons:
It should be noted that the number of fitness professionals who are capable of anything that is properly describable as rational thought is always greatly overestimated. This is to say that the precise number of those in the field who are on the level, intellectually, of, say, a farm raised turkey—(the only animal dumb enough to stare up into the rain and drown itself)—is always put far too low. The same could be said of college professors if it were not so gracious.
To this end, if I were to allot even 1/8 of 1% of the time needed to refute these morons, it would still demand more hours than a day allows.
Secondarily, and surely a hypothesis soon to be tested, is that I fear any criticism of Crossfit will lift the flood gates and encourage a deluge of simpletons to pour in from the backwoods with the heroic notion to defend something that is frankly, indefensible.
These imbeciles tend to make a great mess of things, and I take great effort to keep a safe distance between them and myself at all times.
But, alas, an article* regarding Crossfit has been recently pushed with great force, and so the collective IQ of the human race has been struck down once again—bringing us to a quarterly low of 17.
This article demands nothing less than my full refutation, and no matter how vain my efforts may ultimately be, I—for reasons hardly explainable—believe I’m morally obligated to set myself to this lamentable task. It’s that bad.
*I call it an article because it’s categorized as such on the website, but it is more than an article. The 700 and some odd words when separated out are by themselves fairly harmless. It is only when they are arranged in such a specific and delicate manner—that is, an arrangement made possible only by a legitimate nincompoop—that they then take on a dark and demonic power, like when the straw of a broom is mixed with the lash of a black cats eye. The final effect of this sorcery is the stark reduction of the reader’s intelligence; perhaps a permanent one, too. There are many writings like this. But this is the winning sample.
The article, I should mention, is written by some fellow named Joshua Bunch and is called It’s Crossfit and It’s Going to Hurt. You may read it HERE.
[EDITORS NOTE: Mr. Bunch, the author, Joshua the Dopey, and The Cretin may all be used interchangeably henceforth.]
No man, I dare say, can ever enter into that article and come out the other end in a bettered condition, mentally, physically, or otherwise. Yet I can’t help but to find its general air somewhat charming. It’s stenched in stupidity—no doubt—but still, once I started I could not leave it alone until it was read three times through, each time to the very finish!
With each pass I was hooked more deeply by its incoherent, but nevertheless enthused ramblings, and slowly found myself feeling sentimental about it—to a minor degree.
Mr. Bunch’s baby is incurably deformed—botched to the farthest extent of the word—but still, it is his darling, and we ought not so hastily toss it off a cliff. We have a duty to first inspect it, to cast a closer eye onto its hideous face, to see what there is to be learned when we study stupidity in its most natural environment, one so rich and conducive for the life and prosperity of the thing itself—the internet. Then we may kill the darling, blast it straight to hell.
Now it is quite important that you enter into Mr. Bunch’s article with properly set expectations.
First, do not imagine in there you will find any ingenuity or imagination. All of Dopey’s fragile defenses have been raised at one time or another by other imbeciles.
*Amazingly, Joshua makes no attempt to shield himself with Crossfit’s most strained defense mechanism—to call itself a sport and to duck behind the cover that that brings. Even more astonishingly, he brings with him to battle no tested weaponry at all! For example, he makes no mention of good coaches vs. bad coaches in the world of Crossfit. This is a common maneuver to avoid crossfire, and a sometimes powerful neutralizer, but he doesn’t even think to bring it up. He has effectively managed to leave his entire suit of armor at home and venture into the trenches clad only in socks and underpants. This is a commendable merit.
Second, do not think you’ll find in there anything describable as lucid thought, logic, or sense. But this is not a markdown—not in the slightest, not at all—no, in fact, this is The Cretin’s highest selling point entirely—this is precisely what makes his work so humongously endearing (!)—precisely what captivates the mind against all of its working rationality, shackles it until one has read it to the finish many times, and leaves it in a prayerful state for more!
I’m sure many of you, by now, have been harassed by this bunkum ten times over. If for the off chance you have not, I’ll attempt to paraphrase the author’s thesis in short: Crossfit is bound to hurt you (injure you). And this is OK because it will make you look good.
To begin, the author trots out the claim that training resembles a coin:
“Training is like a coin. One side is result; one is risk. You can’t have one without the other.”
If we are to follow the trail of this mishandled analogy, we are to reach the conclusion that each time we train we are at a 50% risk for injury—as this is the generally accepted theory of coin toss probability, is it not? That each time you toss a coin you are evenly likely to land hands as you are tails? If this theory holds, then something here looks wrong…
Undeniably, there is inherent risk with training, as there is with all other things. But unless you are setting someone to the business of what this author calls Crossfit—which is to say setting someone to the business of puerile nonsense—then that risk should be on par with what is assumed from walking the dog, flying in an airplane, riding in an elevator.
This author…
…Let me diverge to talk on Mr. Bunch’s writing style, as it’s strangely distinctive and worth a passing mention. It’s similar to the common style of today—the kind of where one tries very hard to write well, but ultimately does not succeed. Most idiots can write this style. But Mr. Bunch’s, I believe, is truly inimitable. Not even the lowermost idiot could write. To reiterate: Not even Greg Glassman himself could write it. Joshua is less talented as a writer, I’m afraid, than he is even as a coach—that is, his abilities with words are on par with what one might reasonably expect out of an unwashed baboon. But this wrongs the baboon and I shouldn’t have said it.
One example, to scratch the itch, then I pass on.
“When you start CrossFit you will be overwhelmed by a sense of accomplishment. It hangs in the air like the smell of a pretty girl's hair. You'll feel like the mayor running for office in Pleasantville - kissing babies, shaking hands, making friends”.
The first rule, when handling similes, is to set them up so that they are contextually appropriate. For this, he cares nothing. The second rule is then to make them not suck. Appears to be above that as well.
This fellow is not a coach, but an entertainer. He is to the fitness industry what Kevin Trudeau is to weight loss, a court jester, nothing more.
To further drive my point:
“To this day, after six years of constantly CrossFitting, I still get butterflies every time I workout. I don’t get them from imminent bliss - I get them from inevitable pain. Pain I choose to endure, risk I choose to take for the tremendous reward to follow. Rewards that look like chiseled abs and massive shoulders on the outside. “
Statements like these may suck in the mentally botched, but mean nothing to folks who’ve been to school. The intelligent person understands that aesthetics are not a faultless reflection of good health. The intelligent person understands that eye-catching aesthetics—what this fellow likens to “chiseled abs and massive shoulders on the outside”—are quite obtainable without “inevitable pain”.
Now as much fun as we’re having, do you think would be unfair for me to continue this diatribe solely against The Cretin? As dull as he may be, he is but one very stupid person in an organization full of very stupid people. He is admittedly a small mark lower than most, perhaps, but still he is a common constituent.
Crossfit: Fitness Delirium Tremens?
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Crossfit—created in 2000 by Greg Glassman—has quickly become something of a public nuisance.
There have been a number of cases marking Greg as more of a comedian than a coach, so I can only imagine that this whole Crossfit thing started out as a joke. But the danger with venturing satire, you see, is that Greg fell into a trap shared by many humorists: people took him seriously. So, before long, Crossfit, flourishing lushly in the fields of folly, began to attract—in the thousands—the less civilized.
Today romantic fools hurl themselves through a series of daily systemic thrashings, all the while wrenching elbows and crunching spines with slapdash technique and a less than choice selection of exercises. This is not to say that all of the ingredients are wrong, but rather, it’s the general recipes themselves--the mixings, the orderings, and the serving sizes that appear incorrect.
I love heavy deadlifts. But not “for time”. I love Olympic lifting. But not “for time”. To rep these out “for time” limits the major functions of these movements (to increase limit strength and raw power) and promotes a minor function traditionally unrelated to both the deadlift and Olympic lifting; this is to say a metabolic endeavor, which is better served by, well, just about anything else, really.
The most basic and appropriate function of exercise, if I recall from last month’s issue, should be to condition someone for something other than exercise. Whether that something is a sport or not is of small significance. Exercise is, and should remain, a means to an end, but Crossfit has forgotten this detail. This is a dangerous enterprise.
Turn exercise into a competitive sport and you’ve plowed fertile grounds for grievous bodily harm. Quality is swapped for quantity, things get sloppy, people get hurt.
Mr. Bunch offers his concerned response to this in closing:
“Haters try to destroy CrossFit's reputation by telling stories of people getting injured because they pushed too hard in a WOD or local competition. Let them tell those stories. If there ever was a sales pitch for CrossFit, that's it. Any exercise program that can motivate people to work that hard - to give their all - is exceptional and worth defending. “
His article is at last complete, a minimum of twenty sentences written, and not a single one of them of any value! What brilliancy! This is an effect no one man could ever achieve unintentionally. No, this is a concentrated effort. This is by design.
While he may be done, I am not.
Intense exercise is best served in small to moderate doses, which is to say, just enough to get the job done and not an smidgeon more. Crossfit has overlooked this detail as well.
I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again, even at the risk of coming off as overly repetitious: a workout should contain no unnecessary exercises and a training program no unnecessary workouts. Crossfit pays no attention to this.
Their defense to this is to say the Crossfit athlete is both strong and lean. Well, sure, some of them are. But levels of strength and leanness are not perfect indicators of health or function. I’m strong and lean. But I don’t dare say this is what makes me healthy. To understand this is to know what it means to say there are differences between fitness and health, performance and wellness.
Furthermore,let's not forget that exercise should promote beautiful movement, and serve to correct dysfunction, never exaggerate it. This too, is a detail that has tiptoed past the sights of Crossfit.
Their defense here is to jump into the ambiguous term of scalability. But this argument is both infantile and irrelevant. Scalable does not mean progressive. Scalable does not mean appropriate.
Is There a Solution?
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So now, we must ask ourselves, is this conundrum solvable? If so, what are the possible solutions? Perhaps we can talk to coaches like Mr. Bunch? Ask them to change their ways*? Educate them?
*I’ve found it’s mostly best to avoid talking sense to the people, as they confuse logic for a headache. It seems that, in all respects, they are to various degrees deathly allergic to intellectual discussion; any engagement of their prefrontal cortex results in an immediate, and profound series of adverse bodily reactions—a violent temper tantrum—a jarring of the head, a balling of the fists, a stomping of the feet. If, however, your intention is to reprimand them, then it is best to squirt them gently on the nose with a water mister.
Some propose radical remedies, going so far as to say Crossfit should be banned. But I don’t think that. Quite the opposite, really, as I’m a large proponent of individual liberty. And with freedom comes every man’s right to be jackass.
Besides, Crossfit has proven to serve a hidden, but valuable purpose—one that up until now has been carried out only by public zoos. That is, it keeps all of idiots in one place and it keeps them entertained. Shut down the Crossfit boxes and where will they all go? Congress?
But here I contradict myself, and am now obligated to recant my previous thesis and submit the following: Crossfit is not a public nuisance; it is a wholly just and efficient public service. As it is nature’s way for the unintelligent to congregate, commingle, and beget their own kind; any attempt to interfere with this is a dangerous mistake.
And so, if Crossfit provides a location for the containment of the mostly brainless (it does), then membership should not be prohibited, but subsidized. I can think of no better use of the taxpayer’s money. I offer to write the petition myself, and to provide fine cigars to all who will sign it.
- Pat Flynn
PS – There is a chance I could be wrong on all of this, you know. It has happened to me before, once, when some fellow graciously pointed out that I “missed the point”. When I asked him what the point was, he himself could not accurately describe it, least not in plain English. When I asked him if he could point it out to me on the page, he could not, but reassured me it’s right there, said you can’t miss it, sticks out like yellow thong in math class. Apparently, my eyes glided over it, but my brain did not pick it up. Apparently. When I asked him if he could please direct me to a higher authority on the matter, someone who might have caught this elusive, indefinable, indescribable communication, and preferably someone who might be able to capture this abstraction and turn it into something inviting, definable, understandable, he, of course, could not, and called me a Jackass. Nonetheless, he remains undeniably correct. I missed the point, whatever it was. And to this day, I still have not found it.
I Hate Crossfit -- By Jim Ferris
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**The following is a guest post by Jim Ferris, strength coach, and presenter at Strength Fest 2013
My name is Jim Ferris and I Hate CrossFit. I am sure that statement has already has you taking sides of love or hate. I am completely fine with that. I am not trying to win any friendships or make enemies. I am simply writing my opinion on a topic. Over the last few months the topic of CrossFit has been brought to my attention by clients, friends, and people asking me what i simply think. Instead of having little chats with people i decided i would just go public with my opinion and let my voice be heard.
I flat out hate CrossFit. SImple as that! So what. I have friends that do CrossFit. Guess what. I also hate cheap domestic beer and country music and i have friends that like all of those too. I am fine with that. Just writing what i feel kids. Yes you crossfitters will defend your “BOX” and say you do it the right way. You will say that you spend so much time on technique and that you care about safety, etc. I have heard it all. Keep drinking that Kool Aid kids. I have my reasons for how i feel.
For those knowing nothing about me here is a little bio. For 12 years i have been in this field. I have seen the good, bad, and ugly in a variety of ways. I have worked with collegiate teams, S & C coach for the Philadelphia 76ers, trained athletes of all ages, ranges, and abilities. I also have several everyday fitness clients that like to get after it as well. My philosophy of training is to prevent injury, enhance performance, and educate as much as i can. I believe in science, i believe in application of theories and practice, i believe in doing things the right way. I have a few certifications from CSCS, NASM, FMS, TPI. I also have a 4 year college degree in Exercise Science. The letters after my name do not define me. My GYM Ferris brand is a training philosophy using the knowledge i have gained from all of those certifications, internships, workshops, books, and discussions amongst my peers over the years. Nothing is really set in stone with me. I am constantly thinking, rethinking, and tweaking how i go about my ways. I am not a CSCS guy, or a NASM guy. I am my own brand. I disagree, agree, debate with my peers and its always done with RESPECT. I believe its how you get better as a coach. At least it works for me that way
CrossFit serves a small percentage of the fitness community. There are 3 types of crossfitters from what i can see. The cream of the crop that shine in this so called sport have a decent athletic base, high level of pain threshold and simply do not get injured or can train thru pain. Those that fail at CrossFit are those of the unfit community and have low levels of pain threshold. There is that middle group of on the fence athletes who will either get better or get hurt. If you can survive the early stages of CrossFit you should see some fitness changes. Your body is adapting to a new form of exercise so it is very simple to get better. If you never tried yoga before I am sure you would be much better after a few months. Make sense???
So what bothers me so much about CrossFit? Why do i hate it? I am simply going to list briefly four reasons why i am not a fan of this so called sport.
Reason #1 - CrossFit Certification
I hear so many stories about people that do crossFit for 3-6 months it seems and they are really good at it ( whatever that means ). Then all of a sudden they are certified!!! One weekend - no prerequisites needed, and a 50 question test will get you teaching by monday morning. If this certification was on top of having a degree, and some other certifications i would not be so against it. You are simply being certified in someone’s theory. MEMORIZING how to train is not UNDERSTANDING how to train. These weekend warrior certifications are just pieces of paper from my view. There needs to be more to make it relevant.
PS - I do know some CrossFit coaches who have other certifications and degrees which i do have respect for. It is not all hate kids. I am really against the commercialized system it has created.
Reason #2 - Exercise Selection
Olympic Lifts - Power/Explosive exercises
Complex Full Body Exercise. It is all about technique
Power = Strength x Speed
Exercises - Cleans, Power Cleans, Jerks, Snatches
These exercises are not meant for endurance, fatigue, rep outs, or timed events. No debate here. Simple science.
Olympic Lifts require tons of joint ROM and practice. It is a high level exercise skill. It is a Point A to Point B as fast and efficient as possible exercise. The weight is technically weightless when done correctly. If you find yourself muscling up a olympic lift you are not doing a olympic lift correctly. Efficient form in low doses is the only way these exercises should be performed. This is a major issue with me and CrossFit philosophy. You can be a great technique coach BUT when you go into the timing of reps with olympic lifts i simply cant take you seriously on exercise. There is nothing every day life about endurance olympic lifting. Every time i bring this topic of discussion up with crossfitters they have either agreed with me or just gone silent.
Reason #3 - Fitness
CrossFit has taken exercise and turned it into a competitive sport claiming to have the fittest people on the planet. What is fitness? Is it as many reps as possible? Is it a timed event? Surviving a WOD without ripping your shoulders out of socket? Exercise is designed to make you better in everyday movement, your sport, and your life. It should not send you to your knees and crumble you 3-4x a week with AMRAP drills. I do understand people love a good killing to end their workouts. I do it within reason. If my clients, and more importantly my athletes cannot go and perform their sport after our training session i believe i have failed them as a coach. Training with weights while the body is breaking down can cause several issues from muscles, joints, tendons, ligaments, and nervous system.
The Central Nervous System (CNS) plays a massive role in determining how high you can jump. Too much volume of high intensity jumps and heavy weight training causes the CNS to fatigue. When this happens you won't be able to train as hard, run as fast, or most importantly jump as high. Facts are facts but keep doing pogo Box Jumps because you need to get those reps in fast.
PS - I had a physical last month and my heart rate was 54 beats per minute. Blood pressure 120 over 85. Does that put me into the category of fit?
Reason #4 - Injuries - breakingmuscle.com/crossfit/it-s-crossfit-and-it-s-going-hurt
Read the article above. A CrossFit Coach claims exercise is like a coin flip. I kid you not!!!! “One side is result; one is risk. You can’t have one without the other.”
Injury can happen to anyone at anytime even with a great program and a great coach. I have had a athlete tweak a back or shoulder a few times over my 12 years but nothing to put them out of commission. How can you go into a training session with a 50/50 chance of repping out a record or popping your achilles pumping out max box jumps??? Injury can happen anytime, anyplace BUT when your program is preparing you for injury possibility do you not see something wrong with that??? I understand this is one man’s thought and not the majority BUT it scares me that CrossFit allows guys like this to open a box and train people. It is total absolute garbage.
The bottom line is CrossFit has a lack of Quality Coaches, Quality Exercises and Quality Programming. Here is a program i saw posted over the weekend. Explain to me the point of this please.
run 400meters
300 box jumps
run 400meters
300 kb swings
run 400meters
300 goblet squats
run 400meters
I know there are quality coaches and I am sure there are some good workouts floating around out there. Remember i am more against the system of CrossFit, i am not against any individual or box (besides the guy who wrote that story above). Do i want CrossFit to fail? No. I want it to get better because they have the attention of many athletes and fitness enthusiasts. I want CrossFit to improve across the board. Proper education, Proper Exercises Selection and Proper Programming. It is the same for me and my business. I want to give my clients the best, nothing less. I take a ton of pride in my field and i only want to see good for all. CrossFit has zero effect on my business. I simply want to see quality products from every fitness trainer, coach and gym on the planet. Can my mind be changed on CrossFit?? Sure. Fix all the above and i will without a doubt be open to it.
What Do You Think?